Slate:A few nights ago, after cleaning up from the play date I had organized for my 2½-year-old, changing his diaper, and refilling his water, I was about to start cooking him dinner before giving him a bath when the subject of Thanksgiving came up. He didn’t know what it was, so I tried to explain it to him. But somewhere between It’s a special day when we all think about how grateful we are for what we have and So, basically, it’s all about giving thanks, my son took off to terrorize our dog, and I was left stirring pasta that, five minutes later, I had to remind my son to thank me for. My husband and I are incredibly lucky to be able to give our son what he needs and often what he wants, and we are raising him in a wonderful town in which many families do the same. Yet he’s growing up in a bubble, and that terrifies me. If he never truly struggles for things—important things—and he doesn’t spend much time with people who do, will he ever realize he’s got it so good? And will he ever want to do anything to make the world better? I know—rich/white/entitled people problems. This is the upper-middle-class parent’s existential enigma: How can we lovingly provide for our kids without turning them into spoiled brats? How can I teach my child to be thankful?…“Often, parents are the least appreciated in a child’s world,” says Ross Thompson, a developmental psychologist at the University of California at Davis. That’s a somewhat perplexing fact, but in many ways, Thompson says, it makes sense.…There’s a final way that parents may overindulge their kids, says Stanford University psychologist Carol Dweck: They make their kids feel entitled by how they speak of them. “When kids think, ‘I’m great, I’m special, things are coming to me because of my wonderfulness and specialness,’ there’s no gratitude there,” she says. “So the parents who are always telling their kids how brilliant they are and how much better than other kids they are, who go and fight with coaches and teachers who give them any criticism, they’re telling their kids, ‘you have everything coming to you by virtue of who you are.’ ” I certainly wouldn’t feel grateful for having an awesome life if I were told over and over again that I deserved nothing less—and I also wouldn’t be very interested in helping others, because hey, they probably deserve their misfortune.Read the whole story: Slate More of our Members in the Media >
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GET THE BEST OF THE JAPAN TIMES Top Japanese Nordic combined skier Daito Takahashi was absent from the championship along with other national team members competing on the World Cup circuit. IN FIVE EASY PIECES WITH TAKE 5 NAYORO, Hokkaido – Yoichi Nagai overtook 14 skiers with a strong cross country run to win the Nordic combined national championship on Sunday. Nagai, who was 15th after the ski jumping portion Saturday, posted the fastest time in the 15-kilometer cross country race in Nayoro, Hokkaido, to defeat Yuta Okitsu by 7.6 seconds. Kohei Takao came third 11.2 seconds behind the winner.
Hearts are unlikely to keep Arnaud Djoum beyond the end of the season, manager Craig Levein has revealed.The Cameroon international is out of contract in June after nearly four years at Tynecastle.Djoum has been hampered by injuries in the past 18 months but has been back to some of his best form of late since returning to fitness, playing 20 first-team games and scoring three goals.Levein said the player’s desire to win a big contract while in the peak of his career means Djoum is pricing himself out of an extended stay in Edinburgh. “You never know in football. I’d like him to stay longer but right at this minute in time I don’t think we can afford it.”Hearts are joined by new signings David Vanecek and Conor Shaughnessy in Spain, although Peter Haring has remained at home to recover from a double hernia operation.The Austrian midfielder has been playing through the pain for Hearts in the first half of the season and is likely to be out for four weeks.Meanwhile, Levein hit out at the alleged threats made to referee John Beaton in the wake of his officiating of the Old Firm derby match at the end of December.Beaton was given a police escort to his next match after receiving threatening messages.Levein said: “There’s the competitive side of the game and as managers we always want our sides to win.“You’re representing the supporters and they are passionate about winning as well.“But there are always some idiots who overstep the mark and that is what has happened here.“There is just no accounting sometimes for the behaviour of people and it has been disgraceful what has happened.”A meeting is planned between the Scottish FA, clubs and referees after a period where officials have come in for sharp criticism from a number of clubs.Levein added: “Hopefully we can get some common sense from that and look at a way forward.” Speaking to STV from the Hearts winter training camp south of Murcia in Spain, Levein said: “[Djoum] might leave in the summer.“He’s at an age where he wants to get one last big contract in his professional career.“I understand that we can’t afford to pay him the sort of money that he’s looking for.“But I see him still being here until the summer, for sure.